A likely story
Lyrics
she'll ask you for your name she'll ask you for your coat she will try to take your hand she will tell you she understands your story a likely story you'll build a satin bridge you'll paint it vivid red your histories in line your silhouettes in fire three circles and a deadly aim these doors they bang, bang, bang she will try to take a stand she will tell you to her hands the whole story the likely story she'll visit you each week she'll bake you metal cakes she'll keep your name on file she has a hefty pile it goes for miles and miles
Music
Chords
Verse:
B F# C#m G#m F#
Chorus:
C#m F# C#m F# C#m E
Structure
A, A, B, A, A, B, A, A, A, A, A, A, A~
Songwriter Notes
was trying to write something with less words. sort of limited on instrumentation around here these days. i'm going to re-do the melodica part to be less boring/off-tempo. this is just sort of a scratch version for the sake of having something down.
i'm not sure about the structure for this. the la-la part goes on a bit (!), and the drums should be different under the chorus. and maybe there should be one less verse and one more chorus, or more of a build from the quiet part after the second chorus. i'm not sure.
i'm also a little worried that the melody is kind of generic/ripped off from someplace else. that was the part i came up with first, but i had to wait a week or so to find time to record so i was thinking about this and singing it a lot before recording, so maybe that is why it sounds familiar now. but it also sounds a little like "someday" by the strokes, or "where did our love go?" by the supremes. of course, it's pop music so maybe i shouldn't worry about it. :)
Comments
Oooh. This is a good approach for you. Becky and I talked at our last practice about the idea of writing songs and trying to get in under a stringent word limit. Wordiness is something I struggle with a lot. Also, La's and Na's are almost almost always pop music gold. Man, as usual, your harmonies are super. I hear a little bit of S. Mahan influence here, which is of course a marvelous thing. Excellent to hear the boy getting into the act, too! : ) one of the things you're best at is building dramatic arcs with your melodies from verse through to the end of the chorus. by which i mean the verse melody sounds is clearly the verse and the chorus melody is clearly the chorus and the prechrous is clearly the transition and makes you want the chorus real bad. i like the imagery of the lyrics here, too, and that you've let them be a little vague. both of us try to tell stories a lot, i think, and tend to get really specific as a result, which can make being poetic harder. maybe? anyway, i like this. La La sing-alongs are key. Gabemcelwain 10:15, 22 April 2009 (PDT)
